Friday, July 6, 2012
My Darker Side
The title for this post is only slightly ironic. Today qualifies as a pretty rotten day. Everything I touched turned to shit. I found myself unable to talk to anyone without feeling like my foot was firmly shoved in my mouth. Nothing worked the way I needed it to. In the end, I couldn't even fall asleep because my body was wracked so hard by the frustration.
Taking it out on my family was the worst part. I have tried so hard to keep my depression, anxiety, etc from ruling my life. Sometimes the PTSD rears its head. When that happens, all bets are off. The best thing I can do is to just go away for a while. Find some place where I won't be in the way, or have the potential to say or do something awful. It takes such a long time for the emotional hurricane to pass.
I know that everyone is entitled to have a bad day now and then. I would certainly expect that of anyone I know. I guess I just didn't expect this day to suck this bad. My hope is that when tomorrow begins to wrap up, and the weekend peeks over the setting sun, I will feel better about the week as a whole.