Over the past few weeks I have struggled to come to terms with my feelings about my upcoming surgery. How does one prepare for something this massive? I thought I was prepared when I went in for my first surgery back in 2009. Somehow, I don't think it helped. For all of my Boy Scout preparedness, nothing really prepares you for waking up inside the ICU after a month-long coma. I can't think of anything that prepares you for letting go of your career of over 20 years and reconciling yourself to never being able to lift more than twenty pounds, ever again. So many things that now, may change.
So what am I thinking about? Where does my mind go during this time of preparation and anxious overload?
I am thinking about all the experiences that happened during the coma. My extended walk-about in the world I struggle to explain. I have hesitated to write about that time simply because of one comment that was posted to my blog. I think that there is still a fair bit I would like to share, so bear with me as I delve into a few of these stories over the next few months.